Musical life after bands...

[JSett]

As I stare down the barrel of the second half of my life I find myself in a dilemma and a sense of uncertainty. I've been playing in bands since I was 13 years old, which will be 30 years in 2025. I can see the future, and the future is not playing in a band anymore.

Almost all the old people from our local scene have quit, just a handful of us still exist as active musicians, and even less have time or inclination to be in a band any more. The band I'm in is great, we have fun and have some devout fans, but it definitely has an expiration date. When that is is unknown but I know the drummer has plans to move to Ireland in the next few years and the bassist has a young family and a struggling business to prop up. It likely has 18 months to 2 years of life left in it. When either one of those call it a day then there is literally no one else to take their place.

So, what to plan for the next few decades I might get to exist as far as music goes? Just aimlessly noodling in the spare room into oblivion? Go do open mics and solo shows to fill the void? I don't want to join a covers band ( ) and I don't want to be that old guy still hanging onto a dream singing irrelevant dross to half-empty pubs of people that would rather the jukebox was on.

All my musical life, my playing has had a purpose - writing music with the express purpose of it eventually being played in some form of ensemble.... what do I do when there is no ensemble?

So, question to all those who've gone through the in-bands-quit-bands-now-alone phase of musicianship. How do you approach your hobby with that lack of purpose driving it?

Here's me in my element. I will miss this when it's gone:

[Dr Tony Balls]

1) There will always be a band to play in. Maybe you get on with something new that is just less of a commitment, or maybe you find yourself the older guy with some experience playing with some young bucks who can commit at the level you want. There are options. My current band is kind of a blend of those two things. We used to play out a lot more, maybe once a month, and for a variety of reasons we havent played in a few but no one is mad about that because its just a fun band. I'm also 10+ years older than the other two (they looked at me kinda clueless when i brought up Janes Addiction a few weeks ago).

2) Just because your current band is moving away/settling down doesnt mean its over, just on long-term hiatus. I am *still* in a band that started in 2002 in Houston TX, despite the fact that I have lived in NYC since 2003, and our drummer moved to Olympia WA in around 2005. We're even playing in Oakland CA this summer which is wild. We just play much less frequently now and when we do its more like a little vacation with my friends with a show or two involved.

[Rob]

That's a question I've been asking myself for at least a decade, but I'm inclined to agree with Dr. Balls' assessment of nearly limitless options.

I also joined my first band in 1995, though I started late and was almost 18 at the time. Fast-forward 29 years, we're all in our late-40s, and we still get together on the occasional Friday night at the studio, blasting through our classics over a case of beer, for an audience of no one, just because we love playing music together. We still write and record new material that we care about, but we're also all on the same page as far as (lack of) commitment. We're old, and have families, and jobs, and all sorts of stuff that often seems be more important than "the band." We'd certainly play more often if it were up to me, but it's still a damn sight better than not playing.

A couple of us are in another slightly-more-active band (listen on Spotify, if curious). Our singer is 56, and might be moving to Mexico in the next year or two. Will we get another singer? Will one of just step up and take over? Or will we just soft-retire between the occasional reunion shows? No idea, and not sweating it. There are just way too many people out there making music, and way too many bands that will always welcome a good writer and/or player. Might last a few months, like the last shitty local pop-punk band I joined. Or it might turn into years, or even decades of rewarding music.

I'm also a big fan of tourcations. It's not like any label or promoter is going to spend any money on us, but we all go on trips and vacations anyway. Not terribly difficult to just plan a road trip together, and then book some shows along the way. And even if the shows are awful or no one's interested in what we're doing -- who cares? We're on vacation!

As for there being literally no one else to take the place of departing bandmates, I'd wager against that. If you have some devout fans, you almost certainly have players among them -- a couple might even be interested in joining. But even if this band is a spent force at that point, there are always more people just waiting for someone like you.

[JSett]

Thanks for the pointers so far.

I am inclined to agree I guess, there definitely is a lack of musicians in the area though. We live in a relatively small suburban town and most of our 'fans' are quite far away in East London. Our rehearsal space is a great litmus test for the ebb and flow of musos in the area and it's never been quieter down there...plenty of functions bands but only a handful of originals. Those that are seem to be mostly tech-metal bands from what I can hear coming through the walls

I guess time will tell. The longest gap I've had without being in a band was mostly due to Covid. My previous had broken up due to one moving away (the bassist, who's style was an integral part of our sound, and my best mate) and my current one started almost as soon as we could. Even then it was made up of the drummer from the previous and a bassist from a band I used to tour with.

We already have a casual attitude to it all and only gig when we can be bothered or get asked (anywhere from 6-13 times a year at the moment). We're all past trying to 'make it' and don't actually want to, deep down.

Maybe I'm worrying in advance too much. Or overthinking it.

I could just buy a looper I guess

[sal paradise]

I could just buy a looper I guess

Johnny Joe BonaSheeran

[JSett]

I could just buy a looper I guess

Johnny Joe BonaSheeran

I'm gonna have to sell this LP just to stop these I feel. Even then, it might be too late

[marqueemoon]

I'm 50 and play in 3 original bands. It's... a lot at times. In two of them everyone has kids and we have all been friends forever. The third I feel might have a more limited life as everyone else is younger.

I say enjoy it while it lasts (if you are in fact enjoying it), enjoy a little break when it ends, then think about what you want to do next. I'm in the enjoying it while it lasts phase.

I make solo recordings too, and play several instruments (not all of them well, but that's what MIDI and DAWs are for). I love collaborating with others, but I also enjoy doing exactly what I want musically. When bands wind down for me I will do more of that, and would like to do more of producing and recording others.

[s_mcsleazy]

so i've recently been wondering the same thing for myself johnny. my post-hardcore band is looking to go on hiatus again because our guitar player/songwriting partner devan is now a father figure and can rarely get the time off work anymore and our occasional drummer has decided to move back to the netherlands. i've been in quite a few bands over the years and none of them did much more than a few gigs/EP's.

i've had offers to join other bands but it's usually doing covers which i can't stand. that or the bands have just been a really bad fit for me (a lot of music i really don't like) and i'm not really the kinda person who can go solo. so i've been wondering where i even still stand.

also i wanna say last gig i played (filling in for a friend) i noticed most the other bands on the list were all quite a bit younger than we were and in a music industry that feels like it uses logan's run rules for new bands. the phrase "just get out of the way" kept popping into my head.

it's a weird situation.

[Jaguar018]

I am 51. I bought a looper. It is sort of fun sometimes but not that amazing.

Tried to start up a new band with a guy I used to play with, but there were issues. I was not very into the songs he was writing. I was not feeling inspired enough to write new songs myself and then it was just two people with acoustics, which lacks the visceral appeal of even a basic three piece for me. I still haven't been able to tell that person that I'm just not really feelin' it.

The thing I seem to really love is the collaborative spirit + the sound of electric powered instruments.

I want a real band and maybe an occasional show. Miss that.

[JSett]

The thing I seem to really love is the collaborative spirit + the sound of electric powered instruments.

This. It's my main motivation

[seenoevil II]

... I don't want to be that old guy still hanging onto a dream singing irrelevant dross to half-empty pubs of people that would rather the jukebox was on...

Hey look! It's me!

Bands have always been a take it or leave it proposition for me. I've been in a fair few, but not for a looong time. If I were to join one at this point, it would be as a utility man. But then, only for something really fun and genre. Like an alt country band as a drummer or a roots rock group on bass.

I've been in a band that had "it." Like actual real it. And it's fucking electric and nothing can compare. The kind of band that burns itself out in 16 months, but supplies enough stories for a lifetime.

To me, that's creation. And so is making art on your own. Art you actually believe in. When you finish a song, you're genuinely convinced it will put a ding in the world's garage door.

No offense, but bands for bands' sake has never really translated for me. I see them all the time. Hey look, it's the new slow corp, shoe gaze, noise corp blah blah band...and sure enough...yep, that's what it is...good job.

But, again, don't be offended. Really, I'm just telling on myself that I don't know how to have fun or appreciate things for what they are.

But here's the thing. Just as the players in these bands go round and round, so do all their fans and audience. It's people enjoying things for their own sake. And that's sort of evergreen and self sustaining.

[Domm]

just keep playing! Haha! The second you stop the chances of restarting become much harder the older you get! I’m 50 and my current band is all 30 year olds. We got an indie record deal and put out a record in October and are opening for national touring acts here locally. Playing with j.Robbins on his new records tour next week. Didn’t think that would happen at this particular stage in life! I honestly play music because I have to, I’d go crazy otherwise!

[marqueemoon]

just keep playing! Haha! The second you stop the chances of restarting become much harder the older you get! I’m 50 and my current band is all 30 year olds. We got an indie record deal and put out a record in October and are opening for national touring acts here locally. Playing with j.Robbins on his new records tour next week. Didn’t think that would happen at this particular stage in life! I honestly play music because I have to, I’d go crazy otherwise!

Truth. If you don’t make space for music in your life something else will come along to fill it.

J. is a big musical hero for me. Please ask him where he finds all of those incredible drummers.

[UlricvonCatalyst]

I generally default towards home recordings where I programme the beats etc. and play whatever else I deem necessary myself. It's a well-worn path these days.

I was in a studio-based duo when I started working this way and only turned into a one-man-band because my collaborator was a lazy sod who I couldn't pin down to actually play on the stuff I wanted to work on, so I just got on with it myself in the interest of actually producing something.

On a positive note, not having to rely on other people's schedules/goodwill makes things easier and quicker if you're confident in your ability as an arranger. You can always leave the door open for guest spots from friends and acquaintances if you wish, including laying down basic tracks in a studio then augmenting them at home if collaborators can't offer full commitment to regular rehearsals or gigs.

All of which will only take you so far. If you're content with producing art for art's sake you can fill your boots as a songwriting performer-producer, but if you still cling to the dream of 'making it' by the traditional route, be prepared to be disappointed.

[JSett]

but if you still cling to the dream of 'making it' by the traditional route, be prepared to be disappointed.

I gave up on that 25 years ago

I expect I'll end up doing exactly what you describe. I'm a multinstumentalist anyway and can do my own drums, keys, bass, gtr, etc. enough to get me by anyway