"crackwhore" facts

[rrtxoso]

There's no wood in the jaguap's body. It was formed from excess lacquer in Fullerton's spray booths, and chiseled into a jaguar shape by Leo himself. Radiation from nuclear testing in the pacific became trapped in the layers of paint. The jaguap is constantly on the cusp of a nuclear meltdown, leading to ramarkable tonal characteristics. However, after the first 5 owners developed superpowers, the government required that a blue metallic paint with lead flakes be applied to protect the world from the development of supervillains. 30 years later, an unknown person routed for a mini humbucker, channelling gamma rays through the pickup and strings. This beam of energy is believed to have caused earthquakes in Haiti and Peru, as well as the eruption of Eyjafjallajökull in 2010. The rising possibility of another Icelandic eruption is also attributed to an alignment of the supermoon, the jaguap, and a volcano known as Bárðarbunga.

[TWood]

There's no wood in the jaguap's body. It was formed from excess lacquer in Fullerton's spray booths, and chiseled into a jaguar shape by Leo himself. Radiation from nuclear testing in the pacific became trapped in the layers of paint. The jaguap is constantly on the cusp of a nuclear meltdown, leading to ramarkable tonal characteristics. However, after the first 5 owners developed superpowers, the government required that a blue metallic paint with lead flakes be applied to protect the world from the development of supervillains. 30 years later, an unknown person routed for a mini humbucker, channelling gamma rays through the pickup and strings. This beam of energy is believed to have caused earthquakes in Haiti and Peru, as well as the eruption of Eyjafjallajökull in 2010. The rising possibility of another Icelandic eruption is also attributed to an alignment of the supermoon, the jaguap, and a volcano known as Bárðarbunga.

Brilliant!

[rrtxoso]

The jaguap strikes again.
http://www.cnn.com/2014/08/29/world/asi ... ODtopPhoto

[s_mcsleazy]

The jaguap strikes again.
http://www.cnn.com/2014/08/29/world/asi ... ODtopPhoto

this is what happens when you don't feed her a les paul a week

[invisible man]

Sometimes if she feels she has been wronged, or perhaps just out of spite, the Crackwhore will exclusively emit EDM, house, jungle, trance, smooth jazz, evangelical sermons, etc... when the player just wants to rock. To be more specific, in such a mood she will intuitively understand what genres or characteristics of music you are trying to play, and emit music with the opposite characteristics, just to fuck with you. Do not cross the crackwhore. Do not cross her.

[s_mcsleazy]

some say that the crackwhore is the only person to make ke$ha take a shower in the history of the universe.

[croatan]

ke$ha has smelled wonderful every time i've ever seen her.

[biro]

some vatican's inside source say the crackwhore is the real subject of the third secret of fàtima, claiming the crackwhore has been the beginning and will be the end of everything...
as a side note, they say the crackwore is god's favourite electric...

[niemand]

.

[DaveC]

Some say the crackwhores existence precedes that of both the chicken and the egg.

[croatan]

i heard the crackwhore bakes many souffle's as well, but when you actually meet it, it turns out the crackwhore is a dalek.

[Zero_]

The strings on the CW don’t vibrate when played - she makes the whole universe vibrate around them to fool the eyes of the non-believers!

[hornz]

Apparently, the Crackwhore politely declined Bob Geldof's offer to be played by One Direction on the forthcoming Band-Aid re-re-re-recording.

[DaveC]

When she was built, Leo fender rubbed his junk on her...she then rubbed hers on Leo

[Pacafeliz]

Apparently, the Crackwhore politely declined Bob Geldof's offer to be played by One Direction on the forthcoming Band-Aid re-re-re-recording.

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